Everything is a thigh master - vids for work

The irony behind machines to work the hip adductors. And thigh gap. This is not meant to be a comprehensive report on disordered eating or body image ; )




Plankin! No bench press until you can do at least 20 standard push ups with perfect form.

Suns out - guns out

It's been one year since I underwent a major shoulder surgery for an injury suffered while bench pressing.

The stupid bench press. Just weeks before that injury I had made commentary on how bench pressing is over rated and though my "bench" was inching up on a supposed state record, I just didn't care. Yet I rehabbed, crushed my first Spartan Race mostly one-armed, and rehabbed some more. I managed to put together a few productive and injury free training cycles.

One year later I can close grip bench press 280 pounds for 6 reps. There's no 350+ for reps anymore but who cares? I can chin-up, row, dead lift, and overhead press more than before surgery. I can jump higher and possibly run faster than a year ago - at the age of 36. Yes I'm also a bit more achy but what do you expect? We all know where this ship is headed!

One year later I continue to write more about training and sports performance than rehab because that's what I enjoy and my blogger stats show that relatively few care to read about plantar fascia pain or holistic treatment of shin splints,

At Bonny Lane Club we have a pretty strict dress code. You train with your shirt on unless maybe killer bees or fire ants are actively attacking during the session. The guys and I sporadically joke about those who train like mad in the spring in order to look good in a swim suit. But at Bonny Lane Club, it's always swimsuit season. On my one year shoulder surgery anniversary, it was sunny and I was in the mood for showboating this 85 pound standing shoulder press. The bees and fire ants were miserable that day ; )

The shoulder is moving fine! And two days per week of total body work with basic gear is more than enough when you are consistent, willing to use some resistance, and respect recovery.

10 Best Exercises to Make You Look and Feel Foolish

First a note:

The snarky tone and exercise elitism are usually not my thing, but the tone here is intentional. In the grand scheme of things, who am I to care or tell you how to move your body? Even these Foolish Exercises are awesome badass moves compared to sitting on the couch eating Doritoes all day. Also, some of these may be well justified in the context of rehabilitation or specific physical or mental impairments. 

Now that the disclaimer is out of the way, please do not let me see you doing these unless you have an excellent reason to feel and look like a tool.

To qualify for the list, the exercise had to be a fairly mainstream movement, not a ridiculous gimmicky contraptions like the Shake Weight, the Thigh Master, the Gazelle, or about a dozen other tool makers.

And now, without further ado, introducing the

10 Best Exercises to Make You Look and Feel Foolish and needlessly drain you of the limited time and energy you are given on this planet:

#10 Concentration Curls:

Really? You're seated with both hands between your legs, using one inner thighs for leverage, working precisely 1.2% of the body's muscle mass? You're making deeply stern and serious facial expressions as if holding up an elephant while solving the problem of why cosmic inflation is not self sustaining through quantum mechanical fluctuation.

Now that's one serious exercise!

! Instead: The long head of the bicep is ALWAYS larger, sharper, and more awesome when you can pull
-up, row, and dead lift 25%, 50%, and 200% of your body weight respectively.

#9 Tricep Kickbacks

These are just dumb. Enough said. I don't care if you're 1976 Arnold. You always look and feel foolish while bending over and waving a 30-pound dumbbell, even if you're not out of the house wearing ungodly undies.

! Instead: The triceps are ALWAYS something to reckon with once you can bench press 150% of your body weight, press your body weight overhead, or at least complete 30 continuous "diamond" style push-ups.

 #8 Hip Adduction Machine

You have to be kidding me. When these powerful inner thigh muscles are involved with pretty much EVERY movement of the legs? Go ahead and look it up for yourself! When the hip is in a flexed position (in front of the torso), the adductors extend the hip. When the hip is in an extended position (behind the torso), the adductors flex the hip. The hip adductors stabilize the pelvis and control rotation of the femur during hip abduction (movement away from the mid line). They adduct (move the leg toward the mid line) when that's called for.

! Instead: As an alternative to sitting on this silly piece of technology, try moving your legs! Go ahead. Any thing will do. Congratulations! You have successfully worked your hip adductors! Seriously though, squat and dead lift and lunge and sprint your way to amazing inner thighs.

#7 Hip Abduction Machine

You took this seriously for a moment? You're going to mount what was probably the result of a dare taken amongst a group of frat brothers in their last ditch effort engineering project idea?


! Instead: The hip abductors and external rotators are important protectors of both the knee and hip. They're completely hammered by practicing good form in any and every single leg lower body exercise. Try some single leg split squats or even band resisted side stepping to effectively work this very important muscle group.


#6 Dumbbell Side Crunches

Wow. Um, no. Not worth it. Especially the version where you place one hand behind the head. Repetitive loaded side bending of the spine is a bad idea even when it doesn't look like an awful dance move, white boy.

! Instead: Hold the torso and pelvis super stable with minimal to no frontal plane (side-to-side) movement while doing loaded carries (farmers walks). Do high step-ups or lunges with a relatively heavy dumbbell in one hand.

#5 Wrist Extensions and Flexions

 You have time for this?

! Instead: If you're talking size, the most effective thing you can do to add forearm girth is gain weight. For strength, grip something heavy and lift it. Dead lift, chin-up, hang, row, farmer walk. Leave the gym and be awesome.


#4 Upright Rows

Just...why? When this places the shoulders into combined flexion and internal rotation under load, which is an active, nonawesome position of shoulder impingement?  When the anterior shoulder is hit far more with horizontal and vertical pressing movements, and the side and rear shoulder is worked far more with heavy rows? When the biceps are worked far more with various rows and bicep curls? There's no excuse for this movement.

! Instead: See above paragraph.

# 3 Seated Calf Raises
 
Yeah, I'm aware of the whole thing where plantar flexing (pointing down) the foot while the knee is flexed isolates the soleus muscle. And I don't care. When was the last time you had to simultaneously flex the knee and plantar flex the foot anyway?

! Instead: Jump rope. Sprint. Lift and carry heavy things while on your feet. Work those hard, become functionally awesome, and see how much you care about the circumference of the distal 1/3rd of your lower leg.


#2 Supermans/Womans

Great idea! Use your private parts as a fulcrum to support the weight of the entire body. Cause unnecessary compressive loading to the facet joints of the lumbar spine and potential shoulder problems. Repeat.

! Instead: Do prone press-ups or standing backward bends if you have spine issues that respond well to stretching into lumbar extension (as some disc problems do). Improve the strength of the spinal erectors and glutes with goblet squats. Perform glute bridge, prone plank, and dead lift variations while fighting hard to maintain a neutral position of the thoracic and lumbar spine.

#1 Cable Crossovers

Honorable mention goes to Kipping Pull-ups because that's not a pull-up, it's a momentum seizure with your hands clamped on a bar. But since "Top 11" lists are illegal, Cable Crossovers take the cake.

While a good rule of thumb is that if it feels awesome, and looks awesome, it is awesome, Cable Crossovers are one exception.

Cable crossovers do look awesome. You're standing between two pillars, the ground zero of most commercial gyms, striking repeat front double biceps-like power poses in front of an audience. You're hogging up a significant amount of space, and a lot of things appear to be moving. It feels like you're about to be torn in half, yet you lean in to overcome all odds, crushing the bad guys in a Samson-like display of courage. Nothing else makes you so want to shout White Goodman motivation with every rep!

White Goodman

But the movement, in fact, is not awesome. There's no significant amount of weight being moved. There's no stability challenge or real penalty for failure. You let the 50 or 80-pound stack (which allows for less than half the amount of force due to pulley leverage) to settle down into its spring protected nesting site. You walk out of the center of the universe with fresh legs, barely breaking a sweat and feeling kind of empty.


Okay let's have it! Do you LOVE any of these and want to redeem them? Can you add to the list?

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Weight training for endurance athletes

I don't even train endurance athletes. But I rehab some of them. I know right where to begin...

A few weeks ago I was speaking to the parent of a fairly high level endurance athlete.

"What he [the high school athlete ] needs is to hit the weight room with some high reps and lower resistance in order to keep his conditioning and increase muscle endurance." 

Without the time or desire to stir the kettle, I nodded and went about my work. I know the athlete in question. He completes 90+ minutes of sport specific endurance training 5 days per week, sometimes more than once per day. The last thing this kid needs is to add endurance work. Training that's metabolically different would serve him much better for the sake of improving performance and staying healthy.

Heavy lifting is dangerous and counterproductive for endurance athletes. They need light balance and stability work. Air squats, burpees and crunches between back-to-back bouts of 400 meter runs. Right??

cardio for JSP (MMA Champ)

Giving endurance athletes light resistance activities that primarily demand endurance is like enrolling a mixed martial arts champion in cardio kickboxing, or like switching a diabetic from cookies to cakes. Instead they should work on pure strength and power with low reps and (relatively) heavy loads done safely, at least for the off-season.

I'm not advising training like a meat head, or even like a power lifter, Olympic lifter, or CrossFitter. All these are weight lifting for the sake of weight lifting, which is fine if those are your sports. But if your event takes place in the pool or on the court, track, or field, a little iron can also do wonders, such as improved neural drive, running economy, and metabolic efficiency.

Unless you have a disability or are rehabbing an injury, get off the machines. Quit working your "core" while on your back. I suppose you can can get a decent looking midsection from tons of mat work and a super strict diet. But by the time you can squat, overhead press, and pull a significant load with good form, your core will be functionally epic and at least fairly eyeball shattering.

Lifting heavy demands the brain to move with greater efficiency - because it has to. Heavy lifts done well challenge the entire athlete to maintain good posture and stabilize torque throughout multiple body segments. The rotator cuff (swimmers), IT Band (runners), and on and on will thank you for the solid posture, balanced joint alignment, and tight core from which to leverage.

So what should I do then?

I don't know the finer nuances of endurance training. But I do know that it will be well worth your while to find time for variations of the squat, dead lift, overhead press, single leg movement, and rowing movement, that are well suited for your body type and goals, and get strong in them.

And what's that, but 5 exercises each done maybe once or twice per week? Don't tell me there's no time in your long drawn out workouts for that.

Begin light. Use about half the resistance of what the typical endurance athlete uses for the partial-range-of-motion, crappy-movement-pattern circuit reps. But instead take the mentality of a strong man or woman using perfect form through a full range of motion for just 5 or 6 reps. Rest and repeat. Bump the resistance up from week to week until those 5 or 6 full ROM, perfect form reps are starting to waiver.

Heavy is relative. You're lifting not just for the sake of lifting. Your cardiovascular system is already beastly and receiving tons of attention. So for heaven's sakes, UP the weight!!!

Supplements for sports performance

For some time I've been supplementing my diet with a post-workout whey protein recovery formula that includes both fast- and slow-digesting carbohydrates and protein isolytes high in the amino acid leucine. Check the results:

                                                                   62" Tuck Jump

A few months ago I walked into the local GNC (Cumberland Parkway in Mechanicsburg) to price protein powder and to do some field study for a writing time such as this.

"How can I help you today sir?" 

"Can (may) I get a price on a 2.2 lb container of whey protein powder?"

"Well, we carry...[ya-ta-ta-razzledazzle-yadayadayada]." 

"No thanks man, just straight protein." 

Mr. Push then offered me a host of vitamins and oils that support whey protein and proceeded to ask what I'm training for.

"Oh, you mean like, my training goals?"

At that point I decided to humor him. Kind of. I told him that I'd just like to gain weight, and also to lose weight. Without pause he turned to walk toward a corner of the store where they display five types of fat burners next to male enhancement formulas. He handed me a red and yellow labeled fat burner and some low caloric effervescent creatine.

I glossed over the fine print on a few of the labels. He stood there. I looked up and allowed for awkward silence. THAT was far too much to bear for either of us. So I jumped in and said something like this:

"I'm not so sure. What I really need is something that will just make me better at life."

He paused and smirked. He was FINALLY getting it. I think.

Back to the video, which hopefully serves as more than a showcase for showboating.

A 5'2" tuck jump? Yeah. That just happened.

It happened with no supplements outside of a sporadic scoop of whey protein powder that probably does very little other than make me think I'm "consuming" something good for me. Oh, yeah, and caffeine.

The GNC guy didn't ask if I've set specific training goals and what I may be doing in my work or other life that's pushing me toward or away from them. He didn't care about any physical impairments or my training history. There was no mention of exactly how I'm exercising, much less recovering. He didn't ask if I ate anything for breakfast. I once came across that idea and loved it:

What supplements should you be taking? Well, what did you eat for breakfast today? If you have no time to eat a decent breakfast, then you have no business asking about supplements. 

And this is honestly the best site for supplements EVER. It's evidence-based with nearly 20,000 citations and 0 marketing hype. The search format makes it super user friendly. And right here is a huge Debbie Downer where I go ahead and tell you that outside of caffeine/taurine and creatine, they ALL have a minimal effect. 

Seriously check this out:  http://examine.com/blog/weve-solved-supplement-confusion/

Sorry GNC guy.

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Treating shin splints - you can do better

Shin splints are miserable. They attack one of the boniest, most splintery places in the entire anatomy.

This writing is for those who have already tried the typical ice, soft tissue massage, electric stimulation, activity modification, and anti-inflammatory drugs, only to find the splints remaining firmly in place when they resume the provocative activity, which is almost always running and jumping.

At that point, you probably tried to rectify the problem with something like this:

Dear Shin Splints, ...


Contrary to common belief, shin splints are not due to splintering of bone, but from the tendons of the lower leg muscles being repeatedly pulled from their insertion point on the tibia (the thicker lower leg bone). Shin splints are an inflammatory over-use condition due excessive tensile strain along the lower leg muscles. There's simply too much force, too often, for too long, or some combination of the these.

"Two weeks off" is common first-line medical advice. But you can't afford to waste that two weeks droning away on a stationary bike or [YAWN] elliptical trainer. Running through this problem without treating the root cause can easily progress to a tibial stress fracture. And let me tell you that no matter how badass your lower legs appear in their elaborate kinesiotape patterns, you're going to need more than two weeks to recover from a stress fracture.

Here are some suggestions on how to spend your two weeks off.

1. Be evaluated by a physical therapist who's trained in this area. Seriously. A detailed look at the strength and mobility of the trunk, hip, knee, ankle, and foot, isolated as well as how they work in combination, will usually reveal something contributing to the excessive strain on the lower leg. Analysis of running and jumping technique is invaluable.

 Even if your personal trainer or athletic trainer has the knowledge to identify a portion of these, he or she probably doesn't have the time to assess much less correct the issues.

2. Along those lines, get strong in corrective exercises that target any identified poor movement patterns or other impairments.  Most resistance exercise demands very little impact. A handful of low intensity foot/ankle mobility drills and light resistance work can be performed multiple times per day in order to increase the resiliency of the tissue for when you return to high intensity activities.

3.  Give attention to your shoes. If you train regularly and intensely in shoes that were on sale at Kohls for $34.99, well, you get what you pay for. Serious athletes should not be training in random shoes made with materials fit for driving the kids to soccer practice. There's no substitute for quality shoes correctly fitted and suited for your foot type.

4. Orthotics (off-the-shelf or custom), braces, and taping techniques all hold great potential for decreasing the tensile strain demands of the involved muscles. It's difficult to say which of these may be best for any given individual, but we usually start with the least invasive and costly means and work from there as needed.

5. Return Gradually. Once your two weeks of "rest" are up, do not try to accomplish too much too quickly. That's likely a large portion of what got you into shin splints in the first place.

Keep careful tabs on distance, duration, and repetitions (that's foot contacts for jumpers etc.). Especially watch out for running on hard and graded surfaces. It's the down hill that kills, as well as the plod plod plodding, pounding along when the legs fatigue. This occurs relatively quickly for those who are generally deconditioned, especially if they are above ideal body mass.

I often advise clients to begin with some modified up-hill sprints, in grass if possible. Hill sprints are a semi-specific way to prepare the body for normal running, jumping, and cutting, with plenty of conditioning effect but far less impact.

Miracle Pill

"The real value of running is that it is not work but play," concludes Mark Rowlands in this essay
that attempts to answer the question of why people run. The author goes on to ask if you would still run if you could take a pill that would provide all the health, fitness, aesthetic, and feel-good benefits.



...and you feel happier when you're awesome ; )

The idea of doing something for its intrinsic worth rather than toward another end can be applied to many things in life. I still have a chip on my shoulder about running and other general long-drawn-out cardio exercise. The people who run even though they hate it. The people who love running and just know that running is THE panacea of all fitness. The coaches who overly push distance running onto their athletes to achieve ends that are inconsistent with their goals or the demands of their sport.

But those are not the points of this writing. Running because you like it as play and not work -  certainly no arguments there!

Would I still lift weights and do sprints/plyos and basketball and mountain biking if there were a pill that provided all of the same benefits? That idea seems delusional to me. It smells bad. Dysfunctional. Like sitting down hungry to a nice meal and spitting out every bite.

Pills cannot capture the process of challenging, pushing, building, and growing the entire system. It is literally the mechanical compression and tensile strain that stimulates the body to signal the brain to release an entire army of various hormones, endorphins being among them. The body and mind and spirit benefit most from squaring up to discomfort (in its many forms - definitely not just exercise or physical discomfort). The mental gymnastics, physiological toil, and some sort of objective outcome or aim are all irreducibly connected. Health and vitality and joy come by saying "not today" as you swallow the bitter pill of discomfort.

So yes, when it comes to exercising our bodies, what we call "work outs" can and probably should be considered play. But may we also consider this a process of applying structured, controlled dosages of discomfort that forms and reforms our mind and body and spirit into something it previously was not. This we call "exercise."

This is not true suffering (well, at least it shouldn't be). This is not to say that "zoning out" to the point of hardly noticing the discomfort isn't a valuable experience. But discomfort in this context may be the closest thing we have to a miracle pill.